Angelite Nurses

7 Quick Tips to Manage Stress

By Scott Wallace, Ph.D., R.Psych.

Laughter is one of the most effective ways to manage stress. In fact, there's a science to the stress-reducing impact of laughter. It's called psychoneuroimmunology. What this science says is that laughter can help you boost your immune system functioning. This, in turn, means that you will be less prone to colds and flus and, if you do get sick, you will get better that much faster. If you can't make yourself laugh, then go see someone who makes people laugh for a living—a comic.

Everybody has a unique way of looking at, and interacting with, the world. Some people tend to be a little warm and easy to get to know; others a bit more aloof and distant. As well, some people are dominant or very assertive, and others are meek and perhaps passive. The way you typically see the world and respond to events and people in it is called your personality. A sure-fire way to manage stress is to experiment with different parts of your personality. Be flexible. You don't always have to be passive or controlling. Similarly, sometimes you can try being a bit warmer rather than distant. Do whatever the situation demands, not what your habit or "way" or personality dictates. Being more flexible in your personality helps you manage stress by allowing you to try different ways of talking to people and dealing with events rather than acting out of habit or doing what makes you feel safe. Want to know more about being flexible?

We breathe to fill our lungs with oxygen, the fuel for our bodies, and release waste products from inside. When we become stressed, our bodies demand considerably more fuel. Hence, we start to breath more rapidly and our heart rate increases. However, we also breathe more shallowly so there isn't a very efficient and healthy exchange between getting fresh oxygen in and getting waste gases out. Poor breathing contributes in this way to anxiety and fatigue, and makes stressors harder to cope with.

Relaxed breathing is an effective way to manage stress. Be aware of your breathing. Think "my body can relax," inhale slowly and purposefully noticing the breath as it enters through your nostrils and fills your lungs. Expand your abdomen as you breathe to the count of four, hold the breath for a moment, and slowly exhale to the count of four. For your second breath, visualize warmth and relaxation entering your body as you inhale; tension exiting your body as you exhale. This is a good technique to use when you get a stressful phone call, for example. Put the person on hold, take your breath, release it slowly and thoughtfully, then return to the call. You can also take a few deep, relaxing breaths while in a washroom cubicle, waiting at a traffic light, waiting for a meeting to begin, etc.

Note: If you feel faint when taking deep breaths you should sit down, bend over so that your head drops to the height of your knees, and breathe as you normally do. Sit up slowly.

Stress management is sometimes a matter of reducing the demands that are placed upon you. However, many of these demands come from saying "yes" to too many things. Are you a "yay-sayer" (e.g. "sure, I'll do all the cooking for the party", "certainly, I can work overtime anytime you need me to"). Think about the things that you would like to do and separate these from the things that you have to do and begin to say "no" to some of the expectations other people place upon you if they aren't "have to's." A cautionary note, however. Sometimes we have to do things that we don't like despite temporary feelings of discomfort. You are the best judge. Do what takes care of you, your career, your family, and your relationships. Everything else you agree to is a bonus and should only be considered if you have time and energy.

Believe it or not, this is good advice. Being perfect at everything you do is very taxing and stressful. You don't have to be the best at everything. Keeping up with Martha Stewart can be draining, and following the steps of the fast-rising executive, demeaning. My own research shows that sometimes people who set high standards for themselves get caught in a perfection trap. If they succeed at meeting their personal standards, they only set their standards higher the next time round. So they never feel that they have done a good job. Be a little less hard on yourself, let yourself make some mistakes if they aren't critical.

Set reasonable goals and strive to do your best. Learn from failure but don't beat yourself over the head when you make a mistake. Be a bit easier on yourself. Can you manage that? Well, try.

There is a lot of wisdom in this tip. First of all, playing with a pet can distract you from your worries. So rather than ruminate and feel stressed, focus your thoughts on your pet and thereby begin to feel better. Second, there is a real physical benefit to playing with pets. It can leave you feeling happier and healthier. Finally, playing with your pet may offer you a chance to get active. If you have an animal that likes to run outside, go out and throw a ball for it to retrieve (it doesn't work with my pet—a hedgehog). You'll feel refreshed and, consequently, less stressed.